‘Difficult Decisions’
Sometimes in life, we have to make difficult decisions. And that’s just what I had to do in the last week or so. After a crazy week of school where I had something due in every single class, I realized about a week ago that I just couldn’t keep up with this semester and maintain my sanity at the same time. There was just too much to do (with class and work and life) and not enough time to do it. The most obvious solution to this dilemma would be to drop a class. But dropping a class would bring with it some consequences that I wasn’t sure I was ready to accept. Most importantly, dropping a class and limiting myself to 12-13 credits a semester instead of 14+ would mean that I definitely could not finish my degree in only 3 years like I had planned. It may not seem like a big deal to take some extra time to finish a degree - I mean, people take 5 years for college all the time these days, right? - but the fact that the school technically considers their M.Div. program to be a 3 year thing really cut into my pride. What would it say about me and my academic abilities if I had to take “extra” time to finish my degree? Was I just not good enough?
Fortunately, God allowed good sense to win out over my pride. I figured, what good would it be for me to drive myself crazy racing through this program just to get a piece of paper when I could take a little extra time, save my sanity, and really enjoy and get something out of my classes? I’m not in this program just because I need some letters behind my name in order to get a job. I’m in this program to learn and to be formed as a minister in the Church. That takes time. And it requires all of me, not a stressed out, overwhelmed shadow of me.
So, I made the difficult decision and dropped one of my classes. It was still difficult to actually go through with it, especially since I really like the professor and the topic is one that I would still like to study at some point. But, I know that I made a good decision. It was such a relief to know that my life would be more manageable. And it felt great to have all of that pressure of getting this done in 3 years off of me. I definitely feel at peace and am glad that God made it clear to me what path I should follow.